Are you already dreading the tantrums that your kids are going to throw at you over the Summer months? What about the sibling fights? Don’t get me started on answering back! And what about …. fill in something here that your kids do that drives you potty.
I am here to let you into a secret, are you ready? It is a simple yet effective secret. Here goes… Praise. Praise is one of your BEST parenting tools. If you want to bring about change in your family, my suggestion is you start with praise.
All our children want is our attention and they will pretty much do anything to get it. As parents we hope that our kids will head for the positive attention but the reality is, it is normally a negative one. Tantrums, stubbornness, rude, sibling fighting, not listening, ignoring you until you lose your @#$%. Think back over the last 24 hours. What have your kids done that has got your attention? Can you only recall the bad stuff?
In steps praise. Praise helps us focus on the positive. To notice our kids being good. As when you look for it you will find opportunities. It is not saying to ignore the negative behaviour it is just asking you to accentuate the positive in your parenting so that your children start to feed their need for attention through good deeds and behaviour because they know they will be seen.
Praise the process not just or rather than, the end product.
Praise when your son or daughter takes a step in the right direction to doing what was asked.
Praise without sarcasm.
Praise to someone else about your child so they can hear.
Praise straight away.
Praise when you notice something good going on or even something not so bad!
Praise using your kids names so they can own it.
Praise descriptively so they know what you have noticed, I am not talking an essay here, a short paragraph packed with positives.
Praise values, such as kindness, helpfulness, respect.
Praise with purpose.
Praise, praise, and praise some more and then you know what praise again.
The great thing about focusing on praise, is that when your head is full, you are tired, possibly stressed and you are trying to recall all the great stuff you have learnt to be the best parent you can, you just need to remember praise. Here is to you having a purposeful, positive Summer where your kids get their need for attention through being praised.